Body Language

Petronius, the Roman author wrote in A.D.66: "From a man's face I can read his character; if I can see him walk, I know his thoughts." Almost two thousand years later, a myriad of studies in nonverbal communications confirm the validity of this ancient observation.

For example, John W. Keltner, a specialist in speech communications, concluded that in interpersonal communication, words and tone of voice have an impact of 35 percent and nonverbal messages 65 percent. What you do is more believable than what you say. If an engineer says, "We've tested this design under extreme conditions, and it passed them all," while he's shifting his eyes, swaying, and fidgeting with his pen, the listener will doubt his word. Conversely, if he stands up straight and comfortably, uses natural open hand and arm gestures, and delivers his message with earnest eye-to-eye contact, the listener will believe him because his body language matches his words.

What do people read into your face and walk; handshake and mannerisms; posture and gestures? As importantly, what can you read into theirs? Help Yourself offers a few tips from the experts in how to use body language to communicate more effectively:

Elicit feedback. Whether in interpersonal communication or public speaking, the first step is to become aware of any distracting behaviors or mannerisms which contradict and undermine your intended message. Since it's difficult to evaluate your own nonverbal style, invite friends and coworkers to point out such traits. Ask for their observations and suggestions for improvement. The best teacher is videotaped playback of yourself.

Establish good eye contact. Direct sustained eye contact is the #1 element in presenting yourself effectively and is the key to being taken seriously. It's also the source of feedback that tells you how well you're communicating. Are they with you? Do they understand? Are you belaboring a point? Their eyes will tell you how you're doing. Evaluate your handshake. The handshake which conveys confidence is firm and dry, with strong but not excessive pressure applied steadily for about two seconds and is always accompanied by eye contact. Embrace the whole hand, "web-to-web."

Eliminate shifting eyes, frowning, furrowing brow, hair-twirling, slouching, slumping, swaying, fidgeting, coin jingling, ring or watch twisting, tapping, crossed arms, clasped hands and a swinging foot.

Stand up and think up. When speaking in front of a group, stand up straight and comfortably with your weight evenly balanced. Keep your head up, chin level with the floor, eyes upward and opened brightly with eyebrows and forehead slightly raised especially when making a particular point. Smile. Open your body by holding your shoulders and back erect but not stiff. Open-palmed hands and low broad arm movements say "I'm relaxed with nothing to hide". Train and maintain upward-turned body language to convey honesty, openness and a pleasant demeanor.

Strive for natural, relaxed movements that are supportive of and congruent with your intended message. Remember, what you do is more believable than what you say!